I guess it doesn't matter, like it didn't matter then. No matter how much I try I find myself last in line. Everytime I bit my tongue. Every blow I took. Every fall I willingly allowed. I never got any closer.
But the familiar taste of defeat and regret are no longer my enemies. It is like a comforting friend. Someone who will never leave me. Someone who will always follow me when I run. Someone who will lay in bed with me at night. Someone who will always prove the people right.
The empty streets have never scared me. People leaving me never scared me. Defeat never scared me. Dying never scared me.
Not having an excuse to my failure scares me.
M
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